A. I'm lazy.
B. I don't have that many interesting topics to write about.
C. I'm lazy.
D. I'm boring and lazy.
Given that I'm too lazy to come up with other choices besides "I'm lazy" (although I'm hoping I don't have to spell out the fact that I also did that purposely for comic effect!), it's pretty obvious what the answer is. LAZINESS!
It's OK to be a little lazy. We all need that sometimes. I saw a poster on Pinterest lately that I found amusing:
(For sale at Zazzle.)
But seriously, I'm not here to mock laziness. I love sleeping in, sitting, and watching TV and/or surfing the Internet for hours. Garfield the cat is my spirit animal. Side note: Have you played the Garfield: Survival of the Fattest iPhone game yet? It's the follow-up to my FarmVille-loving days that I never knew I always wanted. (Bonus points if you get that Fools Rush In reference.)
Anyway, it may seem from my funny little quiz up there that I was maybe fishing for compliments, maybe throwing myself a little pity party. "Oh, my life is so boring and blah. I'm so lazy and worthless. No one wants to hang out with me."
Look. We all have issues. No matter how confident someone is (or appears to be), we each have moments of self-doubt. Narcissists may be an exception, but narcissism isn't really something to aspire to, you know? So that's OK.
However, there's a difference between knowing you're not perfect and letting everyone know you're not perfect all the damn time. I do not mean you should pretend you're perfect and that your shit don't stink. But the flipside, by being down on yourself all the time and always, ALWAYS acknowledging your flaws, is just as annoying.
Now, I will freely admit that I have fished for compliments. I think most people have—sometimes intentionally, sometimes not. And sometimes we do need to have a heart-to-heart with a close friend, relative, counselor, whomever, and just say, "I'm not feeling good about myself lately. Here's why." Or "I'm sorry I did _____. That was wrong of me." Or ask questions like "Do I look OK in this shirt?" (Although, again, if that is happening EVERY DAY, keep in mind you might be annoying your friends by asking them to approve your appearance.)
Getting other people's opinions is important, yes. But you are not going to please everybody. And you shouldn't please everybody. Like many fellow Pinners, I have a board designated for inspirational quotes (don't laugh, OK?!). One of my favorites says this: "If everybody likes what you are doing, you're doing it wrong." (A bit of Googling reveals the source of the quote to be artist Jen Bekman.)
Then there's this one: "Waiting for someone else to make you happy is the best way to be sad." I was—yes!—lazy with my Googling of this one, and I couldn't find an obvious source within the first couple of pages. But regardless of who originally said these words, they are some of the most encouraging words I've ever read. It especially speaks to me as a single person, because it reminds me that I am a complete, whole, worthy person without having a partner right now (or ever! You never know.).
Others can certainly make us happy. My parents, sister, grandparents, other family members, friends, and my cat all make me happy. This is more than OK; this is healthy. Just remember that when there's someone you can't please, someone you can't make happy and certainly isn't making you happy, this doesn't mean your worth is diminished.
And also remember—we all have flaws. Embrace them, yes. But advertising them, especially when you're using them as an explanation (read: crutch) as to why "bad" things are happening to you or why your life is not what you thought it'd be like right now, is not going to help you gain sympathy. Pity parties are best attended by only one person: you. A good place to have them is the shower, or maybe in the dim glow of the open refrigerator as you eat a spoonful of chocolate syrup. Keeping a (private) journal is another good choice.
Pity parties do serve a purpose. But please don't invite me to yours. I will not come, and I will not bring a gift.
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